read

I finished Post Office by Bukowski and then bought Women. Post Office was really easy to read. Really easy to follow and feel like you're listening to him tell you what was going on. Its a good story to read, especially if you feel like you're dealing with some shit that comes up to your knees.

Lots of drinking, lots of women, lots of shitty days at work. Lots of daily agony and to an extent, nihilism. And a bit of existentialism, but not directly mentioned. Just, every day is the same whats the point, long nights and fast years kind of things. There were a couple of lines that I had to underline beause they were so profound to where I'm at in my life right now.

I'm looking forward to Women.

I watched High Fidelity yesterday and the ending made me bust out the waterworks. Which is the first time I've cried for a long time. Right at the end when Sonic Death Monkey/Kathleen Tuner Overdrive plays "Lets Get It On", for some reason that killed me. And then the song that came on at the credits too. Oh and when Laura's dad dies and she calls Rob. I had a dream the night before that my dad died, so I think it got a nerve. I love that movie.

I've been having nightmares every night for the past 3 weeks it seems. Things dieing, abandonment, rejection, being lost and dirty. Being a hopeless addict and killing myself. Being ashamed etc etc...